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“I've never told anyone, but… I've always thought they were lighthouses.
Billions of lighthouses, stuck at the far end of the sky.”

“Wow. It must be so lively up there.”

“But it isn’t.
They can see all the other lighthouses out there,
and they want to talk to them.
But they can't,
because they're all too far apart to hear what the others are saying.
All they can do is shine their lights from afar.
So that's what they do.

They shine their lights at the other lighthouses, and at me.

~ Excerpt from 'To the Moon' (2011), au. Kan Gao

I've always found that the most moving pieces of art are those that are just abstracted enough to engage your own reality. This is probably why online folklore and the of ethnogenesis of internet culture appeals to me so much, and probably why the first piece of media to ever make me cry as an adult was an RPG-like indie video game released in 2011 called To The Moon.

A LIGHTHOUSE FEVERDREAM conceptually centres on the themes of childhood, nostalgia, and how we talk about our own mental health. Inspired by Kan Gao's video game and Lisa Maeda's performance in Ariella Como Stoian's To Be A Bat,

A LIGHTHOUSE FEVERDREAM explores the imagery of the loneliness of stars - millions of light years away from each other, only able to communicate by shining their lights. The simplest form of "Hello: I exist".

Sometimes, that's how it feels to be me.

The full text of A LIGHTHOUSE FEVERDREAM - written by myself - can be read and downloaded here.


'A LIGHTHOUSE FEVERDREAM' was written for Salastina's Promising Composers programme of 2022-23, and premiered in Los Angeles, CA, and online in November 2023, alongside works by Riccardo Perugini, Isaac Silva, Jonah Cohen, Mieke Doezema, Celina Kitscher, Nicholas Ma, Jazreel Low, Aaron Israel Levin, and William Jae.

Violin - Luanne Homzy
Cello - Charles Tyler
Piano - HyeJin Kim
Narrator (pre-recorded)
- Lisa Maeda

Note: the pre-recorded text in the Salastina premiere is performed by actor Lisa Maeda. Performances may either utilise a live narrator role or this pre-recorded performance at their discretion.

Interested in performing this work or perusing a score? Get in touch!

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